After I was regenerated by Anton a lot of things became clear to me. I will try to explain them for the most part, for I can understand that reading the last developments in my vacation blog might be a little bit confusing for you readers.
First of all, today is June 23rd, and I am sitting behind Kil's laptop blogging about my experiences today. The date on this post on the blog will appear as August 30th though. If you would open the earlier June 23rd blogpost, you can read about what happened to me today. Time travel has certain limitations that result in side effects like these, because it is based on the premisis that non-material abstract (but substantial) forms (or ideas), and not the material world of change known to us through sensation, possess the highest and most fundamental kind of reality. And then there is some math stuff involved, but thats all just boring stuff really. Anyway, because time travel has different effects on both the material and non-material world, it is essential that the travelers brain gets scrambled. Especially after eating pizza, but that is just a minor detail. Since I didn't have pizza, it was possible for Anton to initiate regeneration of the non-material forms in my brain. The result is that I now can remember things that haven't happened yet. The fact that this blog post will be published on August 30th is a workaround I had to implement so you can read this blog. If I didn't, you wouldn't be able to see it because my time travel happened later on, which resulted in an alternate time-space thread, which confuses computer systems that have been build after the occurence of the millenium bug. See, if the server that hosted the blog, and your computer, were both older systems from 1998, with the BIOS set to a date before Januari 1st 2000, then there would be no problem. Hence, even though this blog post is dated August 30rd, it is really only June 23rd. In short, I have travelled back in time and I am continuing my blog, mainly because I didn't have pizza.
Second, Anton is not who he seems to be. I can't tell Kil about this though, because it would complicate my mission. Anton is really 312 years old and he was a former worker at the Pllltwah! Mining Facility. He managed to escape to earth during the first world war and has been hiding here ever since. When in 1967 the Board of Refugees were secretly brought to Earth, they stayed at Anton's basement for a while. Later on, they one by one disguised as cats to move to Firery's porch to lead the Pllltwah! Freedom Union in their battle for independance. Since then, the Mbooli have send about ten undercover spies to probe the Board of Refugees, but they all failed. My mission is to gain intelligence on the location and current activities of the Board, and to deliver this information on a Plawanka Rod to the Head of Mbooli. What the Mbooli don't know is that I am not only Dutch, but I am partially a descendant of Greg Starfucker, and I operate as a double agent employed by Lord Gemoetoebekhouwe.
Third and last, but not less important, is that although I have a secret agenda, my main reason for being here is to enjoy a well deserved vacation. And thats exactly what I am going to do, and the Mbooli, the Pllltwah! Freedom Union and Lord Gemoetoebekhouwe can all stick their Plawanka Rods where the sun don't shine.
Kil is awake, and is making coffee. We will be visiting Walmart today, and later on we will have a barbeque, but you can read all about that on my blogpost that is dated June 23rd.
vrijdag 30 augustus 2013
dinsdag 27 augustus 2013
The Story of the Plawanka Rod
Today was one of the weirdest days in my life. When I woke up early this morning Kil was still asleep, and I walked downstairs to get me some fake beer and icecream on the porch. It was still dark except for the blinking fireflies, and very quiet, except for the occaisional mosquito flyby. Something was off though. The chocolate icecream remembered me of Firery's homemade icecream. When I concentrated hard enough I could remember eating it in between of seven cats that were trying to communicate with me in German. The thing is, this is was my third day in the USA, and I hadn't visited Firery yet. And then there were these pants. I could't remember buying them. I couldn't even imagine me buying pink pants, let alone pink pants that are as tight as these. And there was more. When I was blogging the other day about my arrival in the USA, I noticed the date of the post was incorrect. It was months into the future. Something very odd was going on.
As I was trying to solve the puzzle, I suddenly heard a voice right in front of me. It was Anton, Kil's neighbour. I smiled. We smoked cigarettes together in the silent darkness and talked about the enviroment, fracking, climate change, Inuit transvestites, nude whalefishing and extraterrestial life. When Anton asked me where I got the pink pants, I hesitated. Should I tell him the truth that I have no clue, and maybe mention the other odd stuff that I had been noticing? Could I trust him? After being silent for a while, Anton suddenly spoke:
"You know, I normally don't talk about what I am going to say next, but I have a strange feeling that I should share this with you. This is going to sound somewhat crazy, I know, but I am under the impression that your brain is scrambled. Also, the pants that you are wearing are standard Mbooli uniform pants, which I haven't seen in a long time. It might not make any sense to you what I am telling you now, but I can help you with that. Just follow me to my basement, I have the equiptment ready for a regeneration procedure, after which you will probably feel a lot better. You are not having any stomach problems, do you?"
I was flabbergasted. I had been talking to Anton for 45 minutes and he seemed like a sane person to me all this time. Now it turned out he was having a psychosis. I decided it would be best if I just played along, and as I followed him to his basement I made sure I left all doors behind me open, so I could get out fast if he got aggresive. "Oh, I do need your Plawanka Rod for the regeneration process, do you mind handing it over to me?" I felt so bad for him. He was such a nice guy, it was so sad to see him in this state. He lost his mind completely. Plawanka Rod. What the hell was he talking about? When we stepped into the basement I was surprised. I saw all kinds of unknown machinery, giant tanks of a strange glowing fluid, and an open drawer full of marble penisses from old greek statues. Anton closed the drawer and turned around to lean on it, and asked me again for this thing he called Plawanka Rod. I told him I didn't know what he was talking about. He smiled. "Check your left pocket." I reached into the pocket of my tight pink pants, and to my surprise I found a shiny cylinder with lettering on it that said 'Plawanka Rod version 11.6 Made in Taiwan'. Anton put the rod in one of the machines that instantly lit up. "Is that a Plawanka Rod in your pants or are you just happy to see me," he said, and laughed. "All you have to do is sit down on that crate there, and put your head in the thing that looks like a microwave. Then close your eyes, relax, and end your blog post in caps lock. The regeneration procedure will start then, and you will feel better soon."
"Who are you, Anton?" I asked. "I'll tell you everything about me and my work for the Pllltwah! Freedom Union after you regenerated. Now just relax, close your eyes, AND END YOUR BLOG POST IN CAPS LOCK."
As I was trying to solve the puzzle, I suddenly heard a voice right in front of me. It was Anton, Kil's neighbour. I smiled. We smoked cigarettes together in the silent darkness and talked about the enviroment, fracking, climate change, Inuit transvestites, nude whalefishing and extraterrestial life. When Anton asked me where I got the pink pants, I hesitated. Should I tell him the truth that I have no clue, and maybe mention the other odd stuff that I had been noticing? Could I trust him? After being silent for a while, Anton suddenly spoke:
"You know, I normally don't talk about what I am going to say next, but I have a strange feeling that I should share this with you. This is going to sound somewhat crazy, I know, but I am under the impression that your brain is scrambled. Also, the pants that you are wearing are standard Mbooli uniform pants, which I haven't seen in a long time. It might not make any sense to you what I am telling you now, but I can help you with that. Just follow me to my basement, I have the equiptment ready for a regeneration procedure, after which you will probably feel a lot better. You are not having any stomach problems, do you?"
I was flabbergasted. I had been talking to Anton for 45 minutes and he seemed like a sane person to me all this time. Now it turned out he was having a psychosis. I decided it would be best if I just played along, and as I followed him to his basement I made sure I left all doors behind me open, so I could get out fast if he got aggresive. "Oh, I do need your Plawanka Rod for the regeneration process, do you mind handing it over to me?" I felt so bad for him. He was such a nice guy, it was so sad to see him in this state. He lost his mind completely. Plawanka Rod. What the hell was he talking about? When we stepped into the basement I was surprised. I saw all kinds of unknown machinery, giant tanks of a strange glowing fluid, and an open drawer full of marble penisses from old greek statues. Anton closed the drawer and turned around to lean on it, and asked me again for this thing he called Plawanka Rod. I told him I didn't know what he was talking about. He smiled. "Check your left pocket." I reached into the pocket of my tight pink pants, and to my surprise I found a shiny cylinder with lettering on it that said 'Plawanka Rod version 11.6 Made in Taiwan'. Anton put the rod in one of the machines that instantly lit up. "Is that a Plawanka Rod in your pants or are you just happy to see me," he said, and laughed. "All you have to do is sit down on that crate there, and put your head in the thing that looks like a microwave. Then close your eyes, relax, and end your blog post in caps lock. The regeneration procedure will start then, and you will feel better soon."
"Who are you, Anton?" I asked. "I'll tell you everything about me and my work for the Pllltwah! Freedom Union after you regenerated. Now just relax, close your eyes, AND END YOUR BLOG POST IN CAPS LOCK."
zaterdag 17 augustus 2013
Yay! I have arrived in the USA!
Yay! USA! USA! USA! I'm here! For some reason I feel like I have been here before, but I don't have any memories of it. Strange, I also cannot remember where I got these pants...
Kil was standing at the airport with a sign that said "Raskolnikow", my Second Life avatar name. And even though we never met in RL (or AFK) before, it felt like it was meeting a good friend. Except she isn't as tall as she is inworld. I was very happy to be able to smoke a cigarette after about 12 hours of not smoking, and as you can see it took me only 3 minutes to look like an american cowboy, thanks Kil for the cool hat!
Kil stond op het vliegveld met een bord "Raskolnikow", mijn SL avatar naam, een grappig gezicht bij aankomst. En ook al hebben we elkaar in het echt nog nooit ontmoet, het was alsof ik eeen goede vriend zag, we kennen elkaar via internet al jaren. Op deze foto zie je me genieten van mijn eerste sigaret na 12 uur niet kunnen roken. En, zoals je ziet, ben ik na 3 minuten al volledig ingeburgerd dankzij de cowboyhoed die ik kreeg van Kil als een welkomscadeau.
Traffic in New York city is crazy. People here all seem te be very impatient to be first and get in front of the other, even in a traffic jam. The roads in NYC are one big maze, you can go to any direction at any given moment, and that just keeps going on an on. People are cutting each other off constantly, Kil drives a badass big 1500 RAM truck, so we were good.
Het verkeer in New York is een waar slagveld. Iedereen is ongeduldig, en netjes ritsen bij het invoegen doen ze hier niet. Iedereen duwt door en wie de grootste bek heeft is eerst. De snelweg van Kennedy Airport door de Bronx en verder naar het noorden bestaat uit een groot verkeersplein. Je kunt op elk moment kiezen welke kant je opgaat, constant zijn er af- en opritten, bruggen, tunnels, soms wel vier verdiepingen hoog. In het wilde verkeer waren wij gelukkig veilig, want Kil rijdt in een gigantische 1500 RAM truck. Foto daarvan volgt.
This is the main road of the town I'm staying at. It is really beautifull here. Around the town are mountains and rocks and and a wild river. Everythin is very spacey here, not like in Holland where everything is cluttered together. The town has a great hippie atmosphere, houses are all made of wood and painted in all different colors. The people are very friendly here, everyone says hello on the streets. Nobody locks their doors here it seems, there are no burglars here. Perhaps that's because people here all have guns. And like Kil says, you don't have to actually shoot to scare people away, if you reload a shotgun people will know the sound of it and run fast, 'cause those guns are so brutal, you don't even have to aim to do some damage, in fact, you don't even have to be on the same floor! Coming days I will be hanging out here, taking it easy, and visit parties tomorrow in celebration of the longest day of the year. There will be bands playing and choirs singing in the Widow Jane Mine.
Dit is de hoofdstraat in het stadje waar ik nu ben. Het is hier heel erg mooi, tussen rotsachtige bergen en bossen, en naast een wild stromende rivier. Er is hier overal heel veel ruimte, een groot verschil met Nederland. Het stadje is een soort hippie plaatsje, de houten huizen zijn allemaal geschilderd in vrolijke kleuren, en overal staan bloemen en handgeschilderde borden voor trommellessen en kunst winkeltjes. Niemand sluit hier de deur, zelfs niet als ze een hele dag gaan werken. Er zijn hier geen inbraken. Waarschijnlijk omdat de mensen hier allemaal bewapend zijn, zelfs oude omaatjes die alleen wonen. De komende dagen hang ik hier lekker rond, en morgen zijn er twee feesten om de langste dag van het jaar te vieren, met bandjes en koren die in de verlaten Widow Jane Mijn zingen.
Insects in the USA are huge, like most things are. You can see here this bug is almost the size of my sunglasses. I have no clue what kind of bug this is, and what it's doing. I almost stepped into it when Kil warned me, and pointed out the humongous monster. Bugs this size must be dangerous, they could bite off your leg or roll over your car if you make them angry. The only place where I saw bigger bugs was in the Windows Operating System.
Veel dingen zijn hier gigantisch, bijvoorbeel dit vreemde insect. Ik liep er bijna tegenop toen Kil me waarschuwde, en ik schrok me rot toen ik omhoog keek naar deze rare kever. Veel deed ie niet, een beetje lui liggen tussen de stenen, en dat was het zo'n beetje. Geen idee of ze bijten, maar gezien de grootte bijten ze zo je hoofd eraf als het moet. Ik begrijp steeds beter waarom mensen hier vuurwapens dragen.
Americans eat weird foods. This breakfast cereal has candy in it. It also shows that bears here are dressed as magicians and they grow beards. We don't have cereal like this in Holland, yet. I haven't tried this stuff yet, maybe I dare if I read more about bear magic and countermeasures like woodworm potions to break the curse.
Amerikanen eten rare dingen. Dit granenontbijt bestaat voor de helft uit snoep. Ik heb het nog niet geprobeerd, maar ik kan me voorstellen dat je er veel energie van krijgt, alleen al door de kleurstoffen. Ook kun je hier zien dat beren gekleed gaan als tovenaars en dat ze hun baard laten groeien. Waarschijnlijk levert dat een evolutionair voordeel op waardoor ze zich zo ontwikkeld hebben.
Here I am in the backyard of Dan's place. He has his own river. The water here has no smell to it and looks very clean. No visible fish though, but there are some nice waterbirds here that you don't see much in Holland. I edited this photo to make my legs look white as a vampire's legs, just for fun.
Dit is een tuinhuisje in de achtertuin van Dan, de overbuurman. Deze man heeft een gigantische tuin met een rivier erin. Het water is hier schoon en je kunt hier ook zwemmen. Er vliegen hier reigers rond, maar vis heb ik niet veel gezien.
We went to see the Widow Jane Mine, where they used to chissel and blow
out rocks to grind and turn into cement. Lots of famous buildings were
made by Rosendale cement, like the Empire State building, the building
the statue of liberty is on, and Michael Jackson's face. Inside the mine
there is water dripping everywhere and it formed a beautifull indoor
pool. I took some photo's of it but they didn't turn out that well, will
do that again later.
Dit is de Juffrouw Jannie Mijn, waar ze rotsen uitkapten om cement van te maken. De oude cementfabriek heeft een grote rol gespeeld in de geschiedenis van dit stadje. Het cement van hier is gebruikt in veel bekende gebouwen, zoals het Empire State Building, de onderste verdiepingen van het vrijheidsbeeld en het gezicht van Michael Jackson. Binnenin drupt overal water en is er een groot binnenmeertje ontstaan, de foto's daarvan zijn helaas niet gelukt.
Here you can see me biting a little chicken's ass.
More soon!
Kil was standing at the airport with a sign that said "Raskolnikow", my Second Life avatar name. And even though we never met in RL (or AFK) before, it felt like it was meeting a good friend. Except she isn't as tall as she is inworld. I was very happy to be able to smoke a cigarette after about 12 hours of not smoking, and as you can see it took me only 3 minutes to look like an american cowboy, thanks Kil for the cool hat!
Kil stond op het vliegveld met een bord "Raskolnikow", mijn SL avatar naam, een grappig gezicht bij aankomst. En ook al hebben we elkaar in het echt nog nooit ontmoet, het was alsof ik eeen goede vriend zag, we kennen elkaar via internet al jaren. Op deze foto zie je me genieten van mijn eerste sigaret na 12 uur niet kunnen roken. En, zoals je ziet, ben ik na 3 minuten al volledig ingeburgerd dankzij de cowboyhoed die ik kreeg van Kil als een welkomscadeau.
Traffic in New York city is crazy. People here all seem te be very impatient to be first and get in front of the other, even in a traffic jam. The roads in NYC are one big maze, you can go to any direction at any given moment, and that just keeps going on an on. People are cutting each other off constantly, Kil drives a badass big 1500 RAM truck, so we were good.
Het verkeer in New York is een waar slagveld. Iedereen is ongeduldig, en netjes ritsen bij het invoegen doen ze hier niet. Iedereen duwt door en wie de grootste bek heeft is eerst. De snelweg van Kennedy Airport door de Bronx en verder naar het noorden bestaat uit een groot verkeersplein. Je kunt op elk moment kiezen welke kant je opgaat, constant zijn er af- en opritten, bruggen, tunnels, soms wel vier verdiepingen hoog. In het wilde verkeer waren wij gelukkig veilig, want Kil rijdt in een gigantische 1500 RAM truck. Foto daarvan volgt.
This is the main road of the town I'm staying at. It is really beautifull here. Around the town are mountains and rocks and and a wild river. Everythin is very spacey here, not like in Holland where everything is cluttered together. The town has a great hippie atmosphere, houses are all made of wood and painted in all different colors. The people are very friendly here, everyone says hello on the streets. Nobody locks their doors here it seems, there are no burglars here. Perhaps that's because people here all have guns. And like Kil says, you don't have to actually shoot to scare people away, if you reload a shotgun people will know the sound of it and run fast, 'cause those guns are so brutal, you don't even have to aim to do some damage, in fact, you don't even have to be on the same floor! Coming days I will be hanging out here, taking it easy, and visit parties tomorrow in celebration of the longest day of the year. There will be bands playing and choirs singing in the Widow Jane Mine.
Dit is de hoofdstraat in het stadje waar ik nu ben. Het is hier heel erg mooi, tussen rotsachtige bergen en bossen, en naast een wild stromende rivier. Er is hier overal heel veel ruimte, een groot verschil met Nederland. Het stadje is een soort hippie plaatsje, de houten huizen zijn allemaal geschilderd in vrolijke kleuren, en overal staan bloemen en handgeschilderde borden voor trommellessen en kunst winkeltjes. Niemand sluit hier de deur, zelfs niet als ze een hele dag gaan werken. Er zijn hier geen inbraken. Waarschijnlijk omdat de mensen hier allemaal bewapend zijn, zelfs oude omaatjes die alleen wonen. De komende dagen hang ik hier lekker rond, en morgen zijn er twee feesten om de langste dag van het jaar te vieren, met bandjes en koren die in de verlaten Widow Jane Mijn zingen.
Insects in the USA are huge, like most things are. You can see here this bug is almost the size of my sunglasses. I have no clue what kind of bug this is, and what it's doing. I almost stepped into it when Kil warned me, and pointed out the humongous monster. Bugs this size must be dangerous, they could bite off your leg or roll over your car if you make them angry. The only place where I saw bigger bugs was in the Windows Operating System.
Veel dingen zijn hier gigantisch, bijvoorbeel dit vreemde insect. Ik liep er bijna tegenop toen Kil me waarschuwde, en ik schrok me rot toen ik omhoog keek naar deze rare kever. Veel deed ie niet, een beetje lui liggen tussen de stenen, en dat was het zo'n beetje. Geen idee of ze bijten, maar gezien de grootte bijten ze zo je hoofd eraf als het moet. Ik begrijp steeds beter waarom mensen hier vuurwapens dragen.
Americans eat weird foods. This breakfast cereal has candy in it. It also shows that bears here are dressed as magicians and they grow beards. We don't have cereal like this in Holland, yet. I haven't tried this stuff yet, maybe I dare if I read more about bear magic and countermeasures like woodworm potions to break the curse.
Amerikanen eten rare dingen. Dit granenontbijt bestaat voor de helft uit snoep. Ik heb het nog niet geprobeerd, maar ik kan me voorstellen dat je er veel energie van krijgt, alleen al door de kleurstoffen. Ook kun je hier zien dat beren gekleed gaan als tovenaars en dat ze hun baard laten groeien. Waarschijnlijk levert dat een evolutionair voordeel op waardoor ze zich zo ontwikkeld hebben.
Here I am in the backyard of Dan's place. He has his own river. The water here has no smell to it and looks very clean. No visible fish though, but there are some nice waterbirds here that you don't see much in Holland. I edited this photo to make my legs look white as a vampire's legs, just for fun.
Dit is een tuinhuisje in de achtertuin van Dan, de overbuurman. Deze man heeft een gigantische tuin met een rivier erin. Het water is hier schoon en je kunt hier ook zwemmen. Er vliegen hier reigers rond, maar vis heb ik niet veel gezien.
Dit is de Juffrouw Jannie Mijn, waar ze rotsen uitkapten om cement van te maken. De oude cementfabriek heeft een grote rol gespeeld in de geschiedenis van dit stadje. Het cement van hier is gebruikt in veel bekende gebouwen, zoals het Empire State Building, de onderste verdiepingen van het vrijheidsbeeld en het gezicht van Michael Jackson. Binnenin drupt overal water en is er een groot binnenmeertje ontstaan, de foto's daarvan zijn helaas niet gelukt.
Here you can see me biting a little chicken's ass.
More soon!
donderdag 15 augustus 2013
Final Debriefing of Subject #11's Mission to the United States of America on Planet Earth
FOR FOUR EYES ONLY!
Location: Interplanetary Support Station Sclaggerwappa
Interstellair Date: 5 across the Zumbio
Subject: 11
Head of Mbooli: Main Mbooli Panaki Uziezie
Main circumstances:
In interregation room 6 we succesfully regenerated subject 11 after his succesfull abduction from the Netherlands on planet Earth. Due to the timing of the abduction (subject was on the toilet doing #2) there is a chance of infestation on the abduction vessel, which is being tested in dock 36 while the Mbooli operation the vessel is placed in quarantine. Subject 11 has regained conciousness and is ready for interrogation.
Interrogation Transcript:
HoM: 'Subject 11, can you for the record state that you regenerated succesfully and are ready for final debriefing?'
#11: 'Where the hell am I? Where are my pants? And why are you speaking with a Nevada accent?'
HoM: 'Subject 11, you are presently at Scaggerwappa for your final debriefing. I am Main Mbooli Panaki Uziezie, currently your Head of Mbooli. Unfortunately we lost your pants during the abduction, there were some complications due to a diarrhea attack. We are currently testing the vessel. I studied english at our base in Area 51 in Nevada, therefor my accent. If you prefer we could do the debriefing in German too. Do you currently feel capable for debriefing?'
#11: 'Debriefing? Is that fun? Who the hell are you?'
HoM: 'We can reschedule debriefing and go on with probing?'
[...]
#11: 'Subject 11 present and ready for final debriefing!'
HoM: 'Have you succeeded in your mission to the United States of America to find the escaped Board of Refugees from the Pllltwah! Mining Facility?'
#11: 'Yes! I found out they were disguised as cats living in Delaware. There were no signs of third parties involved. I probed one of the birdlike creatures that were living closeby, but the probe came out next day together with a white egglike object. I then decided to contact the Board of Refugees directly, posing as a contact from the Pllltwah! Freedom Union, and succesfully gained their trust. Since I was also undercover as a Dutch tourist earthling I had only limited time to gather intel. The information I did get is saved on my Plawanka Rod. And there was something else...'
HoM: 'Go on.'
#11: 'I am not sure, my memory seems scrambled, I'm not sure. I did find a usefull contact in New York State though, his name is Anton and he is very enlightened about the current state of the planet. I was unable to probe him, but I do think he could be a great subject for abduction and training for enviromental missions. Also, since no one locks their doors over there, abduction should not be a problem. Well, assuming there are no diarrhea complications of course, we all know how diarrhea can complicate abduction.'
HoM: 'We have examined your Plawanka Rod, but the data is unreadable. You didn't touch it after being in direct contact with blue crabs, did you?'
#11: 'Oh, no, I never saw any crabs, let alone touch them. I did eat some snake though. They are funny tasting animals, almost tastes like Moonchicken from Pluto. And it was a lot bigger compared to our Wakawaka snakes, then again, everything in America is bigger.'
HoM: 'Our attempt to send you supplies and additional data sticks failed. Mbooli Drtriwawa who was dressed as American Celery did locate you, but you didn't appear at the drop off location. What happened?'
#11: 'It was too risky. I did see the Mbooli dressed as Celery, but at that moment I was in the company of a suspected agent from Lord Gemoetoebekhouwe. He posed as an English professor, but when he smiled I was able to see alien technology behind his lower lip. It was operated by 12 tiny Starfuckers citizens, one of them was sweating a lot. I was able to not panic and act naturally. I probed his beer but the probe seems to disintegrate in American beer.'
HoM: 'My wives just texted me, I have to leave to the mothership instantly. My son just started to throw up his first Wakawaka snake. It's purple!'
#11: 'Ooh, congratulations! No problem, we can always debrief some more later on. And I'll do the probing myself, no worries!'
HoM: 'Thank you #11. We will need no further debriefing. My decision is made. We will send you trough the Monoflux Timelapse Generator, and return you to Kennedy Airport on Earth Date June 22nd. You will repeat your mission, but this time your partial memory whipe will last untill July 9th, so you will be prepared for Lord Gemoetoebekhouwe's agents. Also, make sure you are free of diarrhea during abduction hours, we cannot take anymore risks. But first, get yourself some new pants!'
#11: 'Will do! Can I have my Plawanka Rod back? I use it to level out my old chair.'
HoM: 'You know it is against regulations to use a Plawanka Rod for leveling chairs! Go to the Suply Station and get yourself a decent Futuma Rod for Sclaggerwappa's sake!'
End of transcript
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